December 30, 2013
When I’m brain-fried and don’t want to think about anything, I often watch the History Channel, or H2, or some other “documentary” channel. H2 has been running a new show, “Big History,” that I like mostly because it runs in direct opposition to “Ancient Aliens,” which is so outrageously ridiculous I can’t even articulate. Here’s an example:
“Ancient Aliens:” Why did ancient people all over the world build pyramids? It was aliens! They all had help from Ancient Aliens who came and showed them all about pyramids because ancient humans were too stupid to do anything on their own but drool!
“Big History:” Actually, it was gravity. It turns out pyramids are really stable and don’t fall down, which ancient peoples would have known by looking at…hills.
Another conspiracy-minded “aliens did everything, if it wasn’t the Masons who did it first” show is “America Unearthed,” which is, much like “Ancient Aliens,” ridiculous from front to back. (Ancient Egyptians settled in the Grand Canyon!) But they did do an episode on the secret underground tunnels and secret messages in the artwork of Denver International Airport. It turned out to be fabulous, because the sensationalist host got a nice woman from the PR department at DIA to give him a tour of the airport, including the tunnels, and explain the symbolism in the artwork and all that. “There’s a Masonic capstone here because the Masons place capstones at thousands of public buildings all over the US. You know that, right?” she patiently explained.
By the end the sensationalist host flat-out said, “Yeah, there’s nothing at DIA. The tunnels are just tunnels and the artwork is just artwork.” No equivocation at all. First time I’ve ever seen that on a show like this. It was awesome.