Rise of the Planet of the Apes
August 8, 2011
Or, as it will likely become known in my household from now on: “Battlefield Ape.”
About halfway through I started wondering what Jane Goodall would think of this movie if she saw it. Then I began fervently hoping that she never, ever does.
This is the kind of movie where the first act has a couple of characters who are unlikeable and do mean things, and so you know that they’re going to die horribly in the third act. And they do. Tick tick tick. This is a movie very full of its own importance, and yet so simplistic, so un-engaging and predictable, it’s hardly worth speaking of. Then, driving away from the theater, I realized this has the same basic plot as Battlefield Earth — oppressed natives get smart through magical science thingy and rebel. I think this is hilarious.
Also, everything bad that happens is directly the James Franco character’s fault. I couldn’t tell if he was supposed to be sympathetic, but I certainly didn’t sympathize with him. Because it’s all his fault. All of it. Moron.